Who Do You Tell?


My mum doesn’t know about my blog. Nor do my dad or brothers. Perhaps it’s because my blog feels too personal to share with them. When I first began blogging, I thought that I would tell no one and that the only people I will interact with are those I meet on WordPress and so in this way, my blog will remain anonymous. This means that when one of you ask for a recipe of a dish I posted a picture of, I can only give it if I can covertly find it! So for the lahmachun, Operation Recipe Recovery is still underway.

As the days passed after my first blog post, I began to analyse why I felt that I could not tell anyone about my blog. The first posts were related to money and problems I faced which I think had an impact upon my willingness to announce my writing. Slowly though, I began to realise that there is nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to hide away from so I started to tell a few friends about my blogn Soon, even my teachers knew and from the positive feedback I received, it occurred to me that the feelings or experiences described in alot of what I was writing were simply human, and that people could actually enjoy and empathise with what I wrote.

I admit, compliments about your writing are nice. Especially when it comes unexpectedly such as when a friend once revealed that he has my blog bookmarked and reads it on journeys to and from college. It felt great and still does. I have become more open about my blog now but my closest family members still have no idea.

I actually do not know why I haven’t told them yet but something inside me is wary of the response I will get and how they would analyse my writing word for word. Currently, I write freely but when you have the thought of specific people in mind, you may end up hiding some words and veiling some thoughts. I am sure many people feel the same way which is why I often see blogs which are purely for the WordPress community rather than the blogger’s friends or family.

What about your blog? Who knows about it? Is it purely for yourself like an online diary, a blog for the world of WordPress or for everyone you meet?

98 thoughts on “Who Do You Tell?”

  2. Of course in the digital jungle its a free-for-all, but for yourself it is both exploration and a way to tentatively connect to those of like mind, and/or confront those who are of other mental persuasions… blogging is always in your face provocation in the sense that it’s open to all comers. As for family, friends, associates it would only matter if you had certain topics that might if read disturb them, but this too is good… if you cannot be open to those around you then one might have to rethink one’s actual relations to them. Friends and family should be accepting of your needs and dreams… if they are not then you’ll ultimately have to decide as all do your own path forward. It’s always hard to be honest, but this in the long run is what makes us what we are: otherwise one falls into lies and ideological subterfuge, and becomes a victim of one’s thoughts rather than it instrument of freedom
    Either way your doing great… keep it up!
    As for me: it’s both a way of reaching others, as well as a laboratory for my own polymathic proclivities. My attitude is simple: just be honest, say only what is yours to say, even if it is a commentary on others thoughts, it is still your own mind confronting such worlds. Be true to your own being! You’ll be fine…

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    • True. It does begin as a tentative exploration and then as you meet others, you become more confident.
      Haha well I don’t tend to write embarassing things about my family so the reason why I have yet to tell them of my blog is unclear. Who knows, perhaps I will tell them soon since most others already know.

      Thanks! 😀

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  3. I too started out telling no one and thinking no one would see what I wrote. I just started sharing to Twitter and Pinterest and was a little leery at first. My relatives don’t know and I don’t plan on dealing with them any time soon. I had a friend tell me today she reads my blog and I was shocked. It is funny how I am comfortable telling strangers and friends things but not my parents and I am old lol

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    • Haha you aren’t alone there! We tend to be more open about certain things with friends and strangers because we aren’t used to vocing our thoughts and opinions in such a way to our family.
      I too slowly began to post links of Facebook and then just thought, stop being afraid and see what happens! Admittedly, nothing much did except for a few people clicking it!

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  4. As my blog isn’t exactly personal, more for my writing and all and not so much for sharing more personal things, I don’t really mind so much about who knows about the blog. Though I did wait about a week or so before telling my mother about it, just because of how she might react about it, even though she’s asked me before about how blogs work and all (she’s not all that internet savvy, but she’s learning) because she works as a secretary at her church and they have blogs and stuff. I just made sure to explain what I intended the blog to be for.

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      • She seemed more concerned with where I got the photos from that I was sharing rather than with what I might be writing, and that I gave credit for the pictures. I tried to explain that they were from my Pinterest page, but she didn’t quite grasp what Pinterest was. So I’ve started saying on my photo posts that I’m sharing them from my Pinterest page. She is somewhat supportive of my writing endeavor, though. She just keeps warning me not to share anything too personal, and has been for years, ever since I’ve been doing Facebook and other social media.

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  5. There is only one person who knows about my blog. I explain why I want it to stay anonymous in my author’s note (my first post), but apart from the reasons listed there, I worry that people who know who I am will read too much into things, try too hard to separate truth from fiction (some of my blog is fiction), and then I’ll have to deal with their reactions/allay their fears. I have completely opened myself up to the one friend who knows about the blog, so I’m not worried about saying anything that surprises or worries him/her. I really like the freedom that writing anonymously allows; no one is contacting me trying to figure out who various characters are based upon, or accusing me of writing about them, so I can say whatever the f*** I want, which is refreshing.

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    • I felt the same things! For example, some of the poetry I write may be emotional but people who know me may read for too much into it and begin to worry.
      Writing anonymously certainly is liberating and when I began to tell friends about my blog, I realised this so I had to force myself to banish them from my mind as I wrote in order to express myself honestly.

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  6. When we write, we give of our inner self, the self we share with only the few. By not telling the many, we maintain control of our knowledge and skills until that time when telling the many becomes a simple change in our thoughts about ourselves. When you are ready, then please share for there is worth and strength in your words.
    Papa Nyk

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  7. Mine is for everyone and anyone! 🙂 My family, friends, everyone. The only thing I really keep from my blog due to family seeing it is sex, and swear words. If I must swear though (haha) I just “bleep” it out. I really don’t want an earful from my grandma 😉

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  9. I have a general rule of thumb not to post anything I wouldn’t want my mother or boss to read — in case they find out about it by accident. However, I have done a few anonymous blogs in the past — and told no no one I knew so that I could feel less restrained.

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  10. I used to tell anyone who would listen about my blog (friends, club members, neighbors…) but all they say is “nice” or “really?” and never actually go on it. So I gave up and just kept my blog to myself. I think it’s okay not to tell family member about your personal blog because sometimes if you think you say something humorous about them or someone else, they might think it’s offensive. Well, that won’t be good on either end.

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    • Haha I’ve experienced this too! I’ve found that actually handing them the link or texting it to them works well though.
      True and then if you do tell them, you end up thinking twice about using a certain humorous episode in your blog post.

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  11. Personally, I have only told one friend about my blog because she was my inspiration for beginning in the first place. I feel like a blog is somewhere you can freely express yourself. I think it’s perfectly fine to keep it to yourself because sometimes there are things you need to be able to say without the feedback of those that would analyze things word for word.

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  12. My blog is about a very sensitive topic, and I have only shared my story with a handful of “real” people. So only my husband has read my blog. The only others who see it are people I have met online…typically those who have shared my experience.

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  13. I must say, my family is “secret” as in my family aren’t aware. I don’t feel the need to tell them, in all honesty. I’m doing a-ok! 🙂
    Two friends read it, and that’s how I like to keep it. With my previous blog, I didn’t mind who knew about it, but slowly it became a chore and I felt as if I’d lost a bit of “control.” I’m not saying that’s what’ll happen to anyone’s…it’s just, the way I wrote…it wasn’t satisfying. Now I can be serious, happy, silly, crazy…:) ME! 😀

    And good job with your blog; you’ve done so well and it’s always lovely when a new post pops up in my header. 😀

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  14. It’s so funny to come across your blog post because I was just thinking of this same subject. Oddly enough, I feel quite free sharing my work with the internet but not with people in my physical reality. It’s strange. I rarely show my blog to people on Facebook, but I’ll post it to Twitter where I don’t know anyone in person (and WordPress, of course). Hmmm….I’m going to have to blog about this 🙂
    Thoughtful post!

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  18. Wow I can so relate to your story right now. :/ I have taken the similar decision not to tell my folks at home about my blog (though mine ain’t half as deep or well written as yours) because I feel that that way this is and will be my small arena or my stage where I can be whoever the hell I want without feeling the need to answer awkward questions 😛
    I have an awesome relationship otherwise with my family so at times it leaves me feeling guilty that I’m so comfortable talking and mingling with strangers but so uncomfortable revealing about it to my own family. Well, for now, that’s that.!

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    • Yup having a blog can be a bit like building your own secret den where only you decide who gets to come in 🙂 Haha well I’d say there’s no need to feel guilty, it’s your own writing so just go with the flow! 🙂

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  20. I completely understand.
    I don’t take criticism from my family too well so i feel as though that’s why i don’t share it with them.
    They know i have one, but they don’t know where to find it.
    i think i also need to write more posts in order to get more comfortable with my own writing.

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  21. I have no friends, and my parents are completely internet illiterate. So there is absolutely nobody who would care about my blog in the first place. Hence, it grants me the freedom to be as open as can be.

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  22. Yeah, my blog too, first started out as a ranting platform, a puke bag, for me to express my emotions. hahaha. slowly i let some people in, & yeahhh i guess ultimately, it still remains as my happy place. ^^

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  23. Just like you, my family doesn’t know about it. My mom sees me typing all the time and when she asks what the hell am I typing during summer, I tell her I’m just googling something. It was actually her idea that I start blogging, I laughed thinking who would actually waste time to read it? After a year, I started blogging: writing short stories and political essays about Palestine, Africa… I tried telling someone I was blogging once, he didn’t even ask for the link. -_-

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  25. I use my Blog as a place to wax philosophical and as a general word dump. I try to put my better stuff on it, but as for the poetry, it’s all random comings up that I weave together on a whim.

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      • Thanks. I really do try to make them sound good, so some days I can spend an entire hour just coming up with one verse. I really like the save draft feature, that way if I come up with some really good lines I can write them down and save them for later when I can fill out the poem more.

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      • I just read a few more and am becoming even more fed up with this WordPress app that doesn’t let me Like posts!

        You’re welcome 🙂 Yes the save draft feature is brilliant. Thankfully that works okay on this app!

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  27. My blog is anonymous because I need a place to vent without fear of judgement or anyone getting mad at me for my feelings.
    Writing about my life helps me stay sane. I am thankful for the conection my blog gives me to others: ).

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  28. Good to hear about your friend reading your posts… it’s interesting isn’t it? I am writing mine solely for myself, and yet already in two posts I’ve noticed that I’m addressing an audience, as if I expect others to read it (and I do, even if only a few). Even though I write for my own sanity, it is comforting knowing that it’s out there, available to others to read. If it were not this way, it would almost be like keeping it bottled up in the first place, which defeats the purpose. That’s why art is meant to be shared 🙂

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    • Yes it certainly is. It is like you are getting two for the price of one when it comes to blogging. Peace of mind and an audience and then slowly you begin to trust your abilities and become nore confident in sharing your ideas.

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  29. Initially i told no one about my blog as well. I left the link in my description on different social media sites but I never bothered to actually tell people to go look at it. And I still don’t. I don’t particularly care for gaining publicity for my blog. I enjoy leaving my writing for absolutely anyone to read and benefit from, like tossing a shiny quarter into a fountain or leaving a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk. Sometime I send what i post to those that gave me particular inspiration for what i’ve written though. I don’t keep my blog a secret, I just find freedom in knowing I don’t have to broadcast or hide it. My words are on a journey of their own, free to fly or chill at home haha.

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  30. I don’t tell anyone. I’m not on any social media, either. I’ve never told anyone. I like having a secret. I don’t think I ever will tell anyone. It’s my private life, and if somebody wants to read about it, fine, if not, it doesn’t bother me. I don’t do it for the attention, I do it because I like writing.

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  31. It’s scary to expose writing. I remember being little and hiding my papers under my arms as my teacher would read over my shoulder.

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  33. For the record, your writing is awesome and it has personal touch. It doesn’t feel fabricated so you’re doing well. I think a lot of people don’t dare to openly say certain things. I do have my own blog but there are certain things that I cannot mention due to conflict of interest with other people I know in real life so yeah. True freedom is when you can write openly about anything without the risk of being told off, fired, etc. Keep it up! =)

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  34. As a matter of fact I was going to tell a close friend of mine about my blog. But I forgot the URL. Lol. Actually he’s even considering joining WordPress. I said go ahead! But as for sharing on Facebook and Google. I decided that wouldn’t be a great idea. Last thing I want to do is to lose friends I wasn’t even real friends with in the first place :p

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