Children are not all angelic but nor are they all devilish.
Quite an odd statement to make but what I am talking about here is the attitude people have towards children. As a tutor, I get to meet and hear about different types of parents. There are some who driven by the desire to make the most out of their money, feel that the responsibility lies completely on the tutor’s shoulders and that their children are blameless angels. Then there are those parents who are the complete opposite. They are extremely harsh on their children and never optimistically talk about their education which means any positive action by the child is met by disbelief. Of course, this can cause children to lose any motivation they have to impress their parents.
Now, the parent that strikes a balance between these two extremes would be the best right? Well actually, you can go a step further. The best approach a parent can have to a child’s education is realising there is a three-way relationship.
The Child, The Teacher and The Parent
Speaking from a tutor’s perspective, this is extremely important as often parents feel that paying for tuition should be a guarantee for top results. However, in order for the tutor to help a student, the student has to be willing to learn and they must have a good support system at home. Once, I told a child’s parent that he has not been doing his homework for a few weeks and the response I got was that I should be more harsh on him.
Shocking really. These people seem to be quite relaxed when it comes to their children as they think that by sending them to tuition, they are absolving themselves of all responsibility and their child’s education now lies completely in the tutor’s hands.
At the tuition centre I work at, yesterday there was a parent who was extremely heated up about her child’s bad report in English and claimed her child always behaved well in other subjects. The factor she kept on emphasising was that she should be getting her money’s worth. I feel sorry for the people who had to deal with her as yes, she has a right to claim that she is spending money on tuition but then again, she has to understand that she also must play a part in nurturing, encouraging and ensuring the good behaviour of her child. Even when the reports for the other subjects were brought forward, she refused to acknowledge what they said about her child’s behaviour.
It’s not really a difficult concept to understand but in today’s world where everything seems to be moving so quickly and jobs are made more important than children, fathers and mothers need to stop for a moment and realise that if they want academic success for their children, then they need to spend more time with them in order to ensure they are on track.
Until Next Time,
A Worried Student
A WORRIED STUDENT 
Yes, good point! It’s something I’m thinking about a lot lately, as my daughter will start school in a few months, and I’m expecting homework and much more parental involvement! As you point out, education is a commitment on the part of the parents, too.
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Thanks! Aah well it should be a fun experience for you two, good luck and hope you get the balance right! 🙂
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You are so correct. During my years of teaching in public schools and watching parents in restaurants,I have seen that there has a been a rapid deterioration of parenting skills here in the U.S. It began before the invention of the cell phone, believe it or not. During the past 20 years or so, this generation of parents have decided that teachers should be the parents instead of themselves. Blame shifting like in your example has also reared its ugly head. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that you’ve found this trend in your tutoring. What are you tutoring?
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That’s sad to see, I wonder what has caused this deterioration of parenting skills if it began before the invention of the mobile.
I tutor English at the moment, part-time whilst studying 🙂
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Biblically speaking, once God and our Lord was taken out of public lives by governmental policy or judicial rulings, there were no standards to show parents how to parent effectively. They were lost and on their own. The last 20 years have been discouraging. But with youth like you, there is hope! Remember this.
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Thought i would return a comment, i loved reading this, you know exactly how it is. Parents are commonly too involved in their own life and think parenting is nothing more than providing a roof, a diet and occasionally using the word love! Great post!
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Thanks 😀 Yes that is sadly what SOME parents think it is all about. There are some great examples of real parents however on WordPress which gives me great hope.
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I know exactly where you’re coming from. When I used to teach piano, it used to drive me mad when the kids wouldn’t practise. I wasn’t mad with the children, but with their parents, especially when they suggested their little darlings weren’t making enough progress. It was up to them to make sure their kids practised – after all, they were there every day, I was only there once a week!
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Exactly! One or two hours of tuition compared to being there every day of their lives. They obviously have to do some work aswell.
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